{"title":"GROWN BABY","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"100-natty-croissant-gym-tee-funny-bodybuilding-t-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - France Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eBonjour, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome to The Natty Series, where we prove that the only cycles we care about are bakery cycles. If your diet consists of 100% real carbs, zero fake gains, and an absolute devotion to the pump, this is your new uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a jacked French croissant flexing massive peak-bicep perfection alongside his angry little macaron sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know you are completely fake-free and fueled entirely by yeast, butter, and sheer willpower. No needles. Just kneading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55862516809896,"sku":"1422182_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55862516842664,"sku":"1422182_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55862516875432,"sku":"1422182_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55862516908200,"sku":"1422182_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55862516940968,"sku":"1422182_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55862516973736,"sku":"1422182_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55862517006504,"sku":"1422182_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55862517039272,"sku":"1422182_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55862517072040,"sku":"1422182_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55862517104808,"sku":"1422182_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55862517137576,"sku":"1422182_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55862517170344,"sku":"1422182_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55862517203112,"sku":"1422182_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55862517235880,"sku":"1422182_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55862517268648,"sku":"1422182_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55862517301416,"sku":"1422182_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55862517334184,"sku":"1422182_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55862517366952,"sku":"1422182_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93eadf0a59f.jpg?v=1788078822"},{"product_id":"100-natty-cowboy-burger-gym-tee-funny-american-bodybuilding-t-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - USA Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eListen up, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive slabs of unfiltered American protein and freedom carbs. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by double cheeseburgers, heavy compound lifts, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling American Cowboy Burger rocking a rugged leather hat and flexing colossal dual-bicep, backed up by his angry, jacked little box of french fries as a sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know your gains are authentic. No needles. Just pure backyard grill power and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55862560620712,"sku":"5708533_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55862560653480,"sku":"5708533_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55862560686248,"sku":"5708533_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55862560719016,"sku":"5708533_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55862560751784,"sku":"5708533_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55862560784552,"sku":"5708533_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55862560817320,"sku":"5708533_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55862560850088,"sku":"5708533_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55862560882856,"sku":"5708533_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55862560915624,"sku":"5708533_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55862560948392,"sku":"5708533_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55862560981160,"sku":"5708533_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55862561013928,"sku":"5708533_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55862561046696,"sku":"5708533_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55862561079464,"sku":"5708533_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55862561112232,"sku":"5708533_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55862561145000,"sku":"5708533_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55862561177768,"sku":"5708533_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93eb19f313a.jpg?v=1788078881"},{"product_id":"100-natty-fish-and-scone-gym-tee-funny-uk-bodybuilding-t-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - UK Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eRight then, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive portions of authentic British pub carbs and heavy-hitting baking power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by crispy golden batter, dense baked scones, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling British fish fillet rocking a dapper bowler hat and flexing colossal dual-bicep perfection, backed up by his angry, jacked little afternoon tea scone sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know your gains are authentic. No needles. Just pure chippy power, bakery gains, and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55862587556008,"sku":"4279367_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55862587588776,"sku":"4279367_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55862587621544,"sku":"4279367_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55862587654312,"sku":"4279367_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55862587687080,"sku":"4279367_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55862587719848,"sku":"4279367_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55862587752616,"sku":"4279367_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55862587785384,"sku":"4279367_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55862587818152,"sku":"4279367_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55862587850920,"sku":"4279367_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55862587883688,"sku":"4279367_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55862587916456,"sku":"4279367_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55862587949224,"sku":"4279367_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55862587981992,"sku":"4279367_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55862588014760,"sku":"4279367_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55862588047528,"sku":"4279367_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55862588080296,"sku":"4279367_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55862588113064,"sku":"4279367_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93ec4023934.jpg?v=1788079175"},{"product_id":"100-natty-japanese-sushi-gym-tee-funny-japanese-bodybuilding-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - Japan Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eKonnichiwa, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive platters of authentic Japanese clean carbs and heavy-hitting raw power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by sticky rice, fresh salmon, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling Japanese sushi roll rocking a fierce ninja headband and flexing colossal bicep perfection, backed up by his angry, jacked little wasabi sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know your gains are authentic. No needles. Just pure sushi power, wasabi heat, and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55864787599528,"sku":"1449578_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55864787632296,"sku":"1449578_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55864787665064,"sku":"1449578_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55864787697832,"sku":"1449578_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55864787730600,"sku":"1449578_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864787763368,"sku":"1449578_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864787796136,"sku":"1449578_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864787828904,"sku":"1449578_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864787861672,"sku":"1449578_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55864787894440,"sku":"1449578_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55864787927208,"sku":"1449578_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55864787959976,"sku":"1449578_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55864787992744,"sku":"1449578_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55864788025512,"sku":"1449578_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864788058280,"sku":"1449578_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864788091048,"sku":"1449578_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864788123816,"sku":"1449578_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864788156584,"sku":"1449578_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/image_1c9e100f-167c-40ef-bfeb-b032aaf81e78.png?v=1788211985"},{"product_id":"100-natty-chinese-dim-sum-gym-tee-funny-chinese-bodybuilding-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - China Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eNi hao, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive steamer baskets of authentic Chinese carbs and heavy-hitting dumpling power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by steaming hot bao, savory fillings, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling bamboo dim sum basket packed with soup dumplings, rocking a fierce red headband and flexing colossal bicep perfection, backed up by his angry, jacked little bok choy sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know your gains are authentic. No needles. Just pure dim sum power, steamer gains, and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55864799166632,"sku":"1597203_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55864799199400,"sku":"1597203_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55864799232168,"sku":"1597203_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55864799264936,"sku":"1597203_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55864799297704,"sku":"1597203_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864799330472,"sku":"1597203_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864799363240,"sku":"1597203_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864799396008,"sku":"1597203_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864799428776,"sku":"1597203_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55864799461544,"sku":"1597203_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55864799494312,"sku":"1597203_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55864799527080,"sku":"1597203_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55864799559848,"sku":"1597203_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55864799592616,"sku":"1597203_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864799625384,"sku":"1597203_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864799658152,"sku":"1597203_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864799690920,"sku":"1597203_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864799723688,"sku":"1597203_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93ec73e9ce1.jpg?v=1788079227"},{"product_id":"100-natty-irish-stout-gym-tee-funny-irish-bodybuilding-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - Ireland Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eTop o the morning, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive pints of authentic Irish liquid carbs and raw potato energy. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by thick stout, heavy iron, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling pint of Irish stout rocking a green leprechaun hat and flexing colossal dual-bicep perfection, backed up by his angry, jacked little potato sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know your gains are authentic. No needles. Just pure pub power and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55864806178984,"sku":"9481416_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55864806211752,"sku":"9481416_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55864806244520,"sku":"9481416_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55864806277288,"sku":"9481416_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55864806310056,"sku":"9481416_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864806342824,"sku":"9481416_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864806375592,"sku":"9481416_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864806408360,"sku":"9481416_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864806441128,"sku":"9481416_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55864806473896,"sku":"9481416_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55864806506664,"sku":"9481416_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55864806539432,"sku":"9481416_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55864806572200,"sku":"9481416_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55864806604968,"sku":"9481416_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864806637736,"sku":"9481416_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864806670504,"sku":"9481416_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864806703272,"sku":"9481416_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864806736040,"sku":"9481416_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93f3b01aa68.jpg?v=1788081079"},{"product_id":"100-natty-german-pretzel-gym-tee-funny-german-bodybuilding-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - Germany Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eGuten tag, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we exchange gym shortcuts for massive quantities of authentic European carbs. If your anabolic drive is built on twisted dough, heavy iron, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling German pretzel rocking a traditional alpine hat and flexing colossal dual-bicep perfection, backed up by his angry, jacked little bratwurst sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know you are completely fake-free. No needles. Just pure pretzel power and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55864809259176,"sku":"3683273_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55864809291944,"sku":"3683273_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55864809324712,"sku":"3683273_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55864809357480,"sku":"3683273_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55864809390248,"sku":"3683273_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864809423016,"sku":"3683273_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864809455784,"sku":"3683273_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864809488552,"sku":"3683273_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864809521320,"sku":"3683273_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55864809554088,"sku":"3683273_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55864809586856,"sku":"3683273_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55864809619624,"sku":"3683273_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55864809652392,"sku":"3683273_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55864809685160,"sku":"3683273_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55864809717928,"sku":"3683273_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55864809750696,"sku":"3683273_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55864809783464,"sku":"3683273_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55864809816232,"sku":"3683273_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93f3dcbe855.jpg?v=1788081124"},{"product_id":"natty-spanish-paella-gym-t-shirt","title":"Natty Tee - Spain Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eHola, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive pans of authentic Spanish carbs and heavy-hitting lifting power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by steaming rice, savory toppings, and zero fake gear, this tee is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a massive, smiling seafood paella pan packed with shrimp and mussels, rocking a fierce red-banded black top hat and flexing colossal bicep perfection, backed up by his angry, jacked little chocolate-dipped churro sidekick, this tee lets the whole local iron temple know your gains are authentic. No needles. Just pure paella power, pan gains, and sheer willpower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55874847735976,"sku":"7884012_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55874847768744,"sku":"7884012_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55874847801512,"sku":"7884012_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55874847834280,"sku":"7884012_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55874847867048,"sku":"7884012_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55874847899816,"sku":"7884012_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55874847932584,"sku":"7884012_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55874847965352,"sku":"7884012_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55874847998120,"sku":"7884012_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55874848030888,"sku":"7884012_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55874848063656,"sku":"7884012_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55874848096424,"sku":"7884012_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55874848129192,"sku":"7884012_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55874848161960,"sku":"7884012_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55874848194728,"sku":"7884012_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55874848227496,"sku":"7884012_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55874848260264,"sku":"7884012_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55874848293032,"sku":"7884012_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93f4b0241d2.jpg?v=1788081335"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-japan-edition-t-shirt","title":"Choking Hazard Tee - Japan Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, textured Japanese Sushi character wearing a traditional hachimaki headband alongside his fierce little Wasabi sidekick dressed in green accent tones, this design embodies pure comedic irony. It cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the double meaning undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55896809668776,"sku":"9255001_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55896809701544,"sku":"9255001_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55896809734312,"sku":"9255001_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55896809767080,"sku":"9255001_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55896809799848,"sku":"9255001_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55896809832616,"sku":"9255001_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55896809865384,"sku":"9255001_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55896809898152,"sku":"9255001_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55896809930920,"sku":"9255001_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55896809963688,"sku":"9255001_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55896809996456,"sku":"9255001_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55896810029224,"sku":"9255001_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55896810061992,"sku":"9255001_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55896810094760,"sku":"9255001_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55896810127528,"sku":"9255001_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55896810160296,"sku":"9255001_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55896810193064,"sku":"9255001_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55896810225832,"sku":"9255001_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93f4d64fe80.jpg?v=1788081374"},{"product_id":"stay-mad-bro-japan-edition-t-shirt","title":"Stay Mad Bro Tee - Japan Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe ultimate response to internet haters, gym-floor critics, and anyone else losing sleep over your magnificent and natural size. Consider this your official, unbothered statement piece designed to thrive directly on the collective frustration of your competition. It is a highly confident, comedic power move that lets everyone know you are staying completely relaxed while they stay completely bothered.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, textured Japanese Sushi character wearing a traditional hachimaki headband alongside his fierce little Wasabi sidekick dressed in green accent tones, this design embodies pure comedic irony. It cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the attitude undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55896869339304,"sku":"2995867_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55896869372072,"sku":"2995867_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55896869404840,"sku":"2995867_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55896869437608,"sku":"2995867_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55896869470376,"sku":"2995867_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55896869503144,"sku":"2995867_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55896869535912,"sku":"2995867_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55896869568680,"sku":"2995867_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55896869601448,"sku":"2995867_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55896869634216,"sku":"2995867_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55896869666984,"sku":"2995867_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55896869699752,"sku":"2995867_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55896869732520,"sku":"2995867_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55896869765288,"sku":"2995867_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55896869798056,"sku":"2995867_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55896869830824,"sku":"2995867_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55896869863592,"sku":"2995867_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55896869896360,"sku":"2995867_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a91a06790fd0.jpg?v=1787928691"},{"product_id":"natty-t-shirt-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhen they ask, “Are you Natty?” Consider this your official, unbothered statement piece designed to thrive on the collective frustration of anyone confused by your size. It is a highly confident, comedic power move that cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the attitude undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing the clean cursive \"Natty\" layout elegantly isolated on a premium canvas, this design embodies pure streetwear style with a sharp comedic twist. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the smooth typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55900316893352,"sku":"9339258_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55900316926120,"sku":"9339258_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55900316958888,"sku":"9339258_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55900316991656,"sku":"9339258_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55900317024424,"sku":"9339258_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55900317057192,"sku":"9339258_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55900317089960,"sku":"9339258_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55900317122728,"sku":"9339258_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55900317155496,"sku":"9339258_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55900317188264,"sku":"9339258_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55900317221032,"sku":"9339258_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55900317253800,"sku":"9339258_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55900317286568,"sku":"9339258_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55900317319336,"sku":"9339258_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55900317352104,"sku":"9339258_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55900317384872,"sku":"9339258_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55900317417640,"sku":"9339258_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55900317450408,"sku":"9339258_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93f8a41aeb0.jpg?v=1788082347"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-t-shirt-choking-hazard-series","title":"Choking Hazard Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing the clean cursive \"Choking Hazard\" layout elegantly isolated on a premium canvas, this design embodies pure streetwear style with a sharp comedic twist. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know exactly what they are signing up for without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55900325445800,"sku":"1988841_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55900325478568,"sku":"1988841_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55900325511336,"sku":"1988841_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55900325544104,"sku":"1988841_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55900325576872,"sku":"1988841_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55900325609640,"sku":"1988841_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55900325642408,"sku":"1988841_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55900325675176,"sku":"1988841_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55900325707944,"sku":"1988841_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55900325740712,"sku":"1988841_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55900325773480,"sku":"1988841_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55900325806248,"sku":"1988841_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55900325839016,"sku":"1988841_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55900325871784,"sku":"1988841_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55900325904552,"sku":"1988841_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55900325937320,"sku":"1988841_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55900325970088,"sku":"1988841_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55900326002856,"sku":"1988841_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a93f8c8588b0.jpg?v=1788082384"},{"product_id":"natty-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"UTF-8\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhen they ask, “Are you Natty?” Consider this your official, unbothered statement piece designed to thrive on the collective frustration of anyone confused by your size. It is a highly confident, comedic power move that cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the attitude undeniable.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing the clean cursive \"Natty\" layout elegantly isolated on a premium canvas, this design embodies pure streetwear style with a sharp comedic twist. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003cmeta charset=\"UTF-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55901941661864,"sku":"2738367_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55901941694632,"sku":"2738367_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55901941727400,"sku":"2738367_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55901941760168,"sku":"2738367_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93f5e864d06.jpg?v=1788081651"},{"product_id":"natty-usa-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - USA Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eListen up, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive slabs of unfiltered American protein and freedom carbs. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by double cheeseburgers, heavy compound lifts, and zero fake gear, this hat is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing cowboy burger character holding a side of lifting-fuel fries alongside the signature clean cursive \"Natty\" layout underneath, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55901978624168,"sku":"6850607_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55901978656936,"sku":"6850607_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55901978689704,"sku":"6850607_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55901978722472,"sku":"6850607_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93f6a047c83.jpg?v=1788081834"},{"product_id":"natty-uk-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - UK Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eRight then, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive portions of authentic British pub carbs and heavy-hitting baking power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by crispy golden batter, dense baked scones, and zero fake gear, this hat is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing British fish filet wearing a classic black bowler hat with a UK flag accent alongside his fierce little scone sidekick, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902004019368,"sku":"8712423_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902004052136,"sku":"8712423_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902004084904,"sku":"8712423_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902004117672,"sku":"8712423_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93f7589740e.jpg?v=1788082018"},{"product_id":"natty-china-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - China Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eNi hao, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive steamer baskets of authentic Chinese carbs and heavy-hitting dumpling power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by steaming hot bao, savory fillings, and zero fake gear, this hat is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing Chinese Dim Sum character wearing a traditional red headband alongside his fierce little bok choy sidekick, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902018961576,"sku":"6791519_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902018994344,"sku":"6791519_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902019027112,"sku":"6791519_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902019059880,"sku":"6791519_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93fc2e96412.jpg?v=1788083257"},{"product_id":"natty-france-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - France Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eBonjour, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome to The Natty Series, where we prove that the only cycles we care about are bakery cycles. If your diet consists of 100% real carbs, zero fake gains, and an absolute devotion to the pump, this is your new hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing French Croissant character wearing a classic tilted black beret alongside his fierce little Macaron sidekick dressed in the French national tricolor scheme, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902069489832,"sku":"5549584_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902069522600,"sku":"5549584_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902069555368,"sku":"5549584_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902069588136,"sku":"5549584_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93fbf841783.jpg?v=1788083203"},{"product_id":"natty-germany-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - Germany Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eGuten tag, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we exchange gym shortcuts for massive quantities of authentic European carbs. If your anabolic drive is built on twisted dough, heavy iron, and zero fake gear, this hat is your new lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing German Pretzel character wearing a traditional alpine hat alongside his fierce little bratwurst sidekick topped with mustard, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902161240232,"sku":"3761781_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902161273000,"sku":"3761781_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902161305768,"sku":"3761781_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902161338536,"sku":"3761781_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93fb410a7b9.jpg?v=1788083019"},{"product_id":"natty-ireland-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - Ireland Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eTop o the morning, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive pints of authentic Irish liquid carbs and raw potato energy. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by thick stout, heavy iron, and zero fake gear, this hat is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing Irish Stout character wearing a traditional green leprechaun hat alongside his fierce little potato sidekick, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902181916840,"sku":"7969167_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902181949608,"sku":"7969167_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902181982376,"sku":"7969167_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902182015144,"sku":"7969167_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93fdd652381.jpg?v=1788083681"},{"product_id":"natty-japan-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - Japan Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing Japanese Sushi character wearing a traditional hachimaki headband alongside his fierce little wasabi sidekick, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902195810472,"sku":"9561917_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902195843240,"sku":"9561917_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902195876008,"sku":"9561917_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902195908776,"sku":"9561917_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93fdfbba85a.jpg?v=1788083718"},{"product_id":"natty-spain-edition-dad-hat-100-natty-series","title":"Natty Hat - Spain Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eHola, gym bros and tren-setters. Welcome back to The Natty Series, where we trade shortcuts for massive pans of authentic Spanish carbs and heavy-hitting lifting power. If your daily anabolic drive is fueled entirely by steaming rice, savory toppings, and zero fake gear, this hat is your new official lifting uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing Spanish Paella character wearing a classic black top hat alongside his fierce little churro sidekick dressed in national accent tones, this design embodies pure gym comedy. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know your gains are completely authentic without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902316429480,"sku":"2397706_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902316462248,"sku":"2397706_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902316495016,"sku":"2397706_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902316527784,"sku":"2397706_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a93fe251046e.jpg?v=1788083760"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-dad-hat-choking-hazard-series","title":"Choking Hazard Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing the clean cursive \"Choking Hazard\" layout elegantly isolated on a premium canvas, this design embodies pure streetwear style with a sharp comedic twist. It delivers a premium, unified aesthetic that lets everyone know exactly what they are signing up for without saying too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902324818088,"sku":"4490751_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902324850856,"sku":"4490751_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902324883624,"sku":"4490751_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902324916392,"sku":"4490751_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a9403c232d6f.jpg?v=1788085196"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-japan-edition-dad-hat-choking-hazard-series","title":"Choking Hazard Hat - Japan Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, textured Japanese Sushi character wearing a traditional hachimaki headband alongside his fierce little Wasabi sidekick dressed in green accent tones, this design embodies pure comedic irony. It cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the double meaning undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55902331732136,"sku":"3482302_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55902331764904,"sku":"3482302_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55902331797672,"sku":"3482302_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55902331830440,"sku":"3482302_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a94039a9f1c1.jpg?v=1788085157"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-uk-edition-dad-hat-choking-hazard-series","title":"Choking Hazard Hat - UK Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, flexing British fish filet wearing a classic black bowler hat with a UK flag accent alongside his fierce little scone sidekick, this design embodies pure comedic irony. It cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the double meaning undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Dad Hat is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Yupoong 6245CM Silhouette:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design delivers that timeless, perfect casual fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% Chino Cotton Twill:\u003c\/strong\u003e Highly durable, buttery-soft fabric engineered for all-day comfort and breathability.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Custom Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Crisp, premium white graphics make the smooth typography pop sharply against the dark fabric panels.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable Antique Brass Buckle:\u003c\/strong\u003e Features a clean, hidden self-fabric strap closure that smoothly adjusts to fit any head size.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePermacurv Visor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Properly engineered bill maintains its flawless shape and curve through everyday wear and tear.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProfile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-profile, unstructured crown.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHead Circumference:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fully adjustable from 20 ½” to 21 ⅝” to guarantee a perfect custom fit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrown Height:\u003c\/strong\u003e Clean 3 ⅛” matching standard retail parameters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Hand wash cold or spot clean with a damp cloth. Air dry only to preserve the custom graphic print density and cotton fabric. Do not machine wash or tumble dry.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":55903450398888,"sku":"8757224_7854","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":55903450431656,"sku":"8757224_7857","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":55903450464424,"sku":"8757224_12735","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":55903450497192,"sku":"8757224_8745","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/classic-dad-hat-black-front-6a9400d9dee74.jpg?v=1788084453"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-uk-edition-t-shirt","title":"Choking Hazard Tee - UK Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, textured British Fish and Chips character wearing a classic black bowler hat with a UK flag accent alongside his fierce little scone sidekick, this design embodies pure comedic irony. It cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the double meaning undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide \u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55903457083560,"sku":"8197072_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55903457116328,"sku":"8197072_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55903457149096,"sku":"8197072_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55903457181864,"sku":"8197072_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55903457214632,"sku":"8197072_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55903457247400,"sku":"8197072_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55903457280168,"sku":"8197072_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55903457312936,"sku":"8197072_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55903457345704,"sku":"8197072_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55903457378472,"sku":"8197072_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55903457411240,"sku":"8197072_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55903457444008,"sku":"8197072_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55903457476776,"sku":"8197072_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55903457509544,"sku":"8197072_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55903457542312,"sku":"8197072_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55903457575080,"sku":"8197072_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55903457607848,"sku":"8197072_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55903457640616,"sku":"8197072_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a9400ae2da53.jpg?v=1788084405"},{"product_id":"choking-hazard-germany-edition-t-shirt","title":"Choking Hazard Tee - Germany Edition","description":"\u003cp\u003eA literal warning label for your dating profile. Consider this your official, high-yield disclaimer for anyone who thinks they can handle what you bring to the table. It is a highly confident, wildly suggestive power move that guarantees you stay unforgettable from the second you walk into the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFeaturing a highly detailed, textured German Pretzel character wearing a traditional alpine hat alongside his fierce little bratwurst sidekick topped with mustard, this design embodies pure comedic irony. It cuts straight to the joke with a premium layout that keeps the aesthetic clean and the double meaning undeniable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 \u003cstrong\u003eWhy This Tee is Absolute Peak Quality:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBella + Canvas 3001 Premium Fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% combed and ring-spun cotton — buttery-soft, lightweight, and engineered for everyday comfort.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTailored Retail Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex silhouette with classic side-seamed construction ensures the shirt naturally flatters your frame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eZero Distractions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Custom printed inside labels mean the generic manufacturer paper tag is completely removed — smooth, scratch-free neckline.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-Density Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium ink capture that makes the vibrant character textures and smooth script typography pop sharply against the canvas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt to Last:\u003c\/strong\u003e Shoulder-to-shoulder taping reinforces the garment’s stress points so it retains its perfect shape through endless wash cycles.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📐 Size Guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eChest Width\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth\u003eBody Length\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e16.5\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e18\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e24\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e5XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e35\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTrue to size retail fit. Order your standard size for a clean casual drape, or size up one for a modern, relaxed streetwear look.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e📦 Shipping \u0026amp; Care\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% FREE Domestic US Shipping automatically applied at checkout. 🇺🇸\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold, inside-out, gentle cycle. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Do not iron directly on the artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Straight Face Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":55908428087464,"sku":"3500291_9527","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55908428120232,"sku":"3500291_4016","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55908428153000,"sku":"3500291_4017","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55908428185768,"sku":"3500291_4018","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55908428218536,"sku":"3500291_4019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55908428251304,"sku":"3500291_4020","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55908428284072,"sku":"3500291_5295","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55908428316840,"sku":"3500291_5310","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":55908428349608,"sku":"3500291_12871","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS","offer_id":55908428382376,"sku":"3500291_9546","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55908428415144,"sku":"3500291_4111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55908428447912,"sku":"3500291_4112","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55908428480680,"sku":"3500291_4113","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55908428513448,"sku":"3500291_4114","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55908428546216,"sku":"3500291_4115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":55908428578984,"sku":"3500291_12874","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":55908428611752,"sku":"3500291_12875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":55908428644520,"sku":"3500291_12873","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/files\/image_807bd688-efe2-4528-bdbe-95a22772ff9d.png?v=1788209663"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0758\/3445\/8280\/collections\/unisex-staple-t-shirt-black-front-6a7623079a2b8.jpg?v=1787333063","url":"https:\/\/straightfaceoriginals.com\/collections\/all.oembed?page=2","provider":"Straight Face Originals","version":"1.0","type":"link"}